What are the risks of retiring in France?
Hi, I'm Chris. Head teacher at OuiCommunicate.
We're home to speakers of English who wish for a step up from traditional French classes.
In this article we'll talk about the risks of retirng in France as an expat.
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For simply asking the question.
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The risks of retiring in France
Please read this because it could be a life saver
The lady on the video below told me of an American couple in her village. They’d been using the house as a holiday home in France for 20 years until they decided to go there permanently. It only lasted for a few months. Long story short, their daughter had to fly in from New York, because of medical issues. They did not speak a word of French and could not manage.
This same lady was able to communicate with French doctors, thus acting as a life-saving interpreter between them and her husband when he suffered a heart failure when on holiday. You can read about this in her review next to the video.
I taught the two daughters of an American family (see Fb review) whose parents had decided to relocate in France. Fluency in French was probably needed a lot more than initially expected, especially during the pandemic. They relocated back to America.
Another kind lady who had the project of leaving Britain to live the dream in France also ended up going back to England two years later. (In her Fb review she mentions “schoolgirl French”).
My friends, you would be AMAZED at the thousands of expats who relocate to France every year and overlook the oh-so negligible detail of becoming fluent in French. If you care to check, their stories are all over the various Facebook groups for expats.
They think that French people speak English. Or they think that they will pick up French in their daily interactions at the bakery. Or they think an app and a smartphone will do the job.
My own British mum who has been living in Belgium for over 40 years is still a bit of an expat. I would have liked her to upgrade her French to a higher level for peace of mind, but alas.
When I was last at my parents’ in Belgium, my father had a stone that caused a blockage. I had to phone the ambulance at 10PM and describe the situation. It was all in Dutch and my 80 year old mum could never have coped. The ambulance that came saw us a foreigners and gave us an attitude, claiming they were not a “taxi service”. These things do happen more than we’d like to think.
First problem: What we imagine France to be
We ALL use our imagination when we form a mental picture about things. It’s the way the human mind functions. Before moving to America I had an idea of what it was like. Now I know that it’s hyper-corporate, that there are guidelines for everything and that tradesmen don’t usually like British accents : ) I come across as “snobbish”, it would seem.
The second point that is crucial to understand is that despite our belief that we are rational people, we make most of our decisions based on emotions. Whether it’s our new jeans, our car, our holidays, our TV programs…There are certainly rational limitations to our actions, such as the limits of our funds but even these are bypassed by maxing out credit cards.
The overwhelming majority of people who relocate to France do it for emotional reasons: a certain idea about food, about the scenery, about the culture, about a way of life…and why not? Part of it is true. But is is not all.
At the moment, we could almost say that the taste of Camembert weighs more heavily in their decision than their future survival skills as it pertains to French.
When you read about France and form an opinion, you will be influenced by beautiful pictures, memories of holidays, accounts from other expats saying how incredible everything is…it will be very hard to separate the facts from the myth.
We must remember that there are stages of amazement when we visit a country. At first, everything is different and mysterious. Later, we decide that it is absolutely the best place on earth. Later still, the sense of amazement drops and the “typical” things aren’t so typical after all.Â
The risk I would like to address is that France is not a fairy tale country. People fall ill, heaters explode, windows break, plumbing gets clogged, cars have accidents, the mairie sends us letters, legs get broken…and at one point you are going to have to put more than simple basic French sentences together.
Sometimes even, your French is going to have to be quick (such as the call for an ambulance that I experienced) and it is going to have to be precise (in the case of a break-in, an accident or medical symptoms) If a doctor asks you how you’ve been feeling these past few days you’re going to have to say more than “comme ci, comme ca”.
Second problem: Language schools and French
I am not “the best” at teaching French, but I do have a pretty good clue how the industry functions from the inside. I am able to read through the lines when I see the offers on some schools’ websites.
If you ever read the reviews, you will see that they are emotional. Fun was had, the staff were nice, and the kids loved it. Even when customers say they learned a lot, it remains quite undefined.
Future expats have to understand that language schools work in a very unclear and nebulous business. It would be like defining a “karate expert”. Being an outsider to karate, I wouldn’t know and would have to trust the school’s word.
The larger majority of language schools are in the business of selling “fun”. I will emphasize that there is not shame in this because most industries function in this way. For example, restaurants are not in the business of “feeding” even though they sell food. Their real trade is to sell an enjoyable experience.
These language schools can be a problem, as well as a future risk for yourself. Firstly, it is not in their business interest to say that you did poorly. Everyone gets a medal, in a sense.
Next, you will leave the language school thinking you did OK and start to use French. It will be hard at first but you figure it will come with time. However, what is actually going to happen is that people are going to be forgiving of your French and approach you as a foreigner. They will hear your mistakes but you will stop progressing.
Next, almost all these schools teach “FLE French” done by teachers who are French themselves. In other words, they follow an arguably dated method that is made by teachers who are not native speakers of English.
The authentic charm of France is also seen in the teaching of French and is more often than not unfit for expats. Word to the wise…
Third problem: Higher costs for you
During an online class one day, I saw a French plumber leave the house of my student. She asked him in French if it was “réparé” (mended). Being a non-native, she didn’t pick up on his mocking tone. He said “Well, yeah. If I’m leaving it means it’s mended.”
She then asked him if “le “robinet coule” (does it drip?). He played on the meaning of “coule” which also means “leaks” and said well yes of course it leaks. Whereas he meant “Of course it’s running properly.”
I refrained from intervening through Skype at the rudeness of the plumber until I properly knew the background of the story. But sadly. this is what happens.
Myself, as a native speaker of French I was ripped off by Avis rentals in Narbonne who cleverly charged me an extra day by playing on the words. Full story here.
A different British student told me of a French stone-cutting business that ended up smashing to pieces all the slates he’d ordered because he asked for a written receipt. Word then got round to other local traders.
I have seen firsthand that life is always more expensive when you are older. Businesses just do a less good job. I saw it in the UK with the cleaning business my 80 year old aunt hired, and many others. They figure you won’t complain.
The probability of French electricians, plumbers, mechanics, gardeners, masons (etc) of overcharging you is extremely high especially if your French is that of a foreigner.
If we try to see the world through their eyes, they probably see “wealthy foreigner come to retire in France”. All those extra costs will absolutely add up if you can’t verbally argue.
Fourth problem: Where are my friends?
Both my parents are over 80 years old and my British mum doesn’t have that many friends. She made a few expats friends over the years, some of which moved out, re-married, died even.
Fortunately both are in very good physical health and my brother lives close by. But things could be much different.
Because of our imagination, we overlook the issue of friendship and socialization. We think it will fall into place. But a “so and so” level of French will send out signals to people and make it an obstacle to include you in their group of close friends.
My student in this video happens to be doing an amazing job at meeting all types of French people: farmers, artists, people at the market, local nutjobs even! I have full faith that she will never be alone.
She was able to do this through an exceptionally good level of French. There is literally no part of the communication she can’t understand, except for new words or expressions popping up every so often.
For more info on the difficulties making friends as an expat please read this page. (applies to France also)
Fifth problem: A mission half accomplished?
It may be nice enough to view France as a spectator and only knowing English, but at the end of it all there will be the feeling of a mission half accomplished. Maybe you will have seen but not been a part of it.
It goes without saying that much of the richness of the experience goes through the language. Not knowing French to a sufficiently high level is like being not quite tuned to the frequency.
The way of engaging in French conversation is not quite the same as in the USA or the UK. There is an almost “philosophical-like” aspect that might pass you by.
Not knowing how French people think and exchange ideas limits the visitor to seeing the decor and the landscapes. The bread may be as delicious, but the experience will be hugely limited.
Taking my own inside knowledge of the French people, the very last things I would use in my description of France are precisely those that tourists rank highly. The core of a French person has nothing to do with the cheese, the wine or the Roman bridges.
But for this, we must know them on a deeper level that will only come through a proper use of the French language.
Thanks for stopping by!
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The lady in this video is originally from NY and wished for us to help prepare her move to France.
Today, she is fluent and happily lives in France where she meets new people and uses French daily.
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